but would i tell her the truth?:
"You know there is none more...harmony hairspray perfect in a perfect way
"whether or not armed and arrogant enough to mean it...
"than you...
"But there is one, or in fact a few, perfect songs, ditties; that above - herein, i.e. this ferkin 'post', one of three....
such great beauty it is daft."
But i had not met any woman or soul or transgender ferrit which i could truly state was somehow of such reverence that little ditty inculcates.
Something transcendent in truth.
"Until.
"I saw her face....
"After.... that which i would never ask of you..."
"I cannot lie
"but.... far armed one...
"But that's nowt, duck, whether you shoot em for fun or not....
"I cannot lie....All my life i have quirt rightly been
prejudiced against . the great beautiful queen...
serene (cos they aint, inside) all tat instaing or ancient equivalent, they have to do to keep in the highlands
Indeed i sneer quite rightly if one even deigns to notice
Because i was wise.
Enough to know.
"never".
To quote her ten years ago, plus a free year.
Not on your nelly; i mean laugh and deride
But, bride.
Never.
Twas her look just last week, at
That one sentence.
part Avro; part the last one in the hills, or at least a dump up high where they chucked all the baddy families....for a backhander...
But also that third......
Just that one look is the most glorious i have ever seen by far and is the sublime..
even if i am trickier and know only what it is for.
So it can fuck off and die as that's all it is (More later as long as they resist)
Thing is in truth, that look, it was also or maybe the only ever time, i saw the painting in her expression, of what this one looks like, and as it is my end tune, why haven't I..? Cos I am bored waiting for her answer. I mean it's not as if she was that beautiful...
Even if she is in my notepad as La GB...and like no ohes even had a physical attribute referred to prior today, as beauty is in the what is it ...soul....yes i saw it.... too... i mean talk about ideas above her station...
Anyway that's not the point bully for me
[oh all ths should have quotes imagine them i know what I am doing and do have a perfect memory so can do recostructive surgery or a bit of botox later - i mean surely they were?? but no it didn't fit her...soul..]
There is only one point: I needed nothing, ever for some years. I have nothing. Or very little, and what i do own is so damaged due damp or rust over some years - near eight to be precise, it's worth little. mister Bailiff and co.... Amd i aint some idiot spaz savant gurgling out a load of conspiracy theories or eschatological (nearly...ister spell check) cant and vanity. I have a good library even if a tad rotting. And nowhere to put it later on.
.I pity the so called 'New Age' guru... and his - or more likely these days, and ways, her, customers...
because nothing is really knowable except a few basics and we've known them centuries.
I can write, and think, and sometimes even surprise myself with something succinct, as in just a few weeks ago one of very few little ditties on my wall, "mindfulness, means; always" . Which is a pefect three worder that sums up the extraordinary regularity with which i doscover - say scything their fields for them, or laying their hedges, tat the women charging ever highre figures for their zoom mindfulness ehh....courses, aren't that mindful back at home...or when it comes to leaving tools scattered around to rust in the garden...or cleaning their OWN potting sheds which is the only truly mindful experience i know...
nor does it fail to also mean - no matter what conflict or hypocrisy you have been caught in the act of knickers down.... you react with humanity. Over many years too! or ask for your cash back and have the guru arrested. And if you are the guru at least lock yourself away in a cage without a connection before you do any more obvious harm to the soul.
Anyway yes where was I - i just know they arent botoxed.... but even if they are i could accept that too. Never mind know that when i said to myself a year ago, life is over, and i certainly shall never change such that i would even look twice in the street at some so called "beauty", never mind have a very direct conversation with one, to say the least, that i never have with anyone else so directly, i mean i know myself so perfectly i am wisely constant and always will be..... there isnt a cataclysm in all the bibles in china that would cause me to evolve beyond those hangups and nasty prejudices regarding such things....
On our silver carriage....
There is only one tune....and it can be either way she wishes. I need not ever again know anything. because i do know. And thus freedom is free to defer all and every decision "you could have me kiiled with this information.... contractors do not like wildlife rangers who have a file on them....and their heinous deeds...only you i have told where and when......no one else ...i defer all power to you, now, forever...over me.."
You....chose.
My fate.
Knowing things is only dull. But i know no one ever matched that look...and thus its etched on my hull at least, forever
